To my meow.

Hello wa~

How have you been? Guess you're very free now, after exams and all hectic things, must be feeling happier at home lu. I don't know why am I writing this but something just triggered my feeling to write something for you and myself, without you knowing, without me losing it since I'm a clumsy and forgetful person. Sounds pathetic, but sometimes, we just have to. Okay no, please don't feel so.. man..

So.. How wan ya :3  Must be very happy at home o, have your best bed and all the good food, not to forget, siblings that makes you happy. If you're going to work with your uncle in Cameron Highlands then it will be great since the environment is a lot better there. You will like it there after such stressful month you had. 4 months of break is sweet, I wish I have it too :)

Time is moving faster, I managed to finish my freelance work so that I can start planning and applying jobs. Where to start from? Singapore? With our Malaysian currency like this, Singapore is a better choice tho, most of them agreed on this. Nevermind, apply first, decide later, haha! I was checking my emails few minutes ago and I typed in your email address at the search bar and boom, everything popped out, our emails and some backed up hangout messages. I remember reading them when we broke up, everything, it gave me chills. This could be the reason I am writing this. Everytime we are about to break up, we used to write a long long message/ letter to each other, but this time, we didn't. You probably don't even care expressing yourself to me anymore.

There's many empty plastic bottles at home and I have decided to turn them into my dumbbell, pretty health conscious lately! My muscles are getting obvious now, but it made me look fatter :/  I guess you too na, no muay thai for some time already, plus your back got problem, also didn't update me about your back wan. Hope you're okay na, rub rub meow back. Like an old grandpa already o! Have you imagined how will we look like when we're 70 or 80 years old if we are still alive? I think you'll still look thin, but of course, many many wrinkles, probably more than me, haha. Hmm, I never thought that I will fall sick, like honestly, I'm seldom sick. So that 2 days I felt so shitty, useless much, because I'm supposed to go get my portfolio back. Mana tau fell sick for 2 days! The second night was very saddening, because I am all alone, thinking about what you'll do to take care of me when I'm sick. Couldn't help myself crying like a kid again. You told me you would suck out all the mucus in my nose when I cry, and every time I will laugh, it's too funny and you actually tried to suck it once! I miss these little moments so much.

You know what, sometimes I can totally picture you lying down in bed, or doing things like how you used to at home. 5 years, we actually became friends for 5 years! I know every angle of you and I can imagine you are here, cool huh? I wonder if you do the same. :)  I like you calling me Xiaomi and bao bei alot. Meow meow mi ya, when I think about you, it was always the happy memories, I feel like I couldn't have you anymore now, and future. It all became our past and memories. The moment my mother open her luggage, I knew I will keep and hug the pillow all the time, with my little Mr Faiz. It was one of the happiest moments, as you know receiving presents from you is rare, and it was a big one! together with a note book and a wooden soldier sculpture.. I really really like it, I don't even put anything on it, just for hugging. The urge of texting you is strong, still, but I simply can't do that, I know if I do that, I won't be appreciated anymore. So I can only let it be, let time pass and accept the worst if you're not gonna look for me forever.

What other choice do I have?

Those days when we can bath and take a shit together were the best, we're really comfortable with each other and can do disgusting things that grosses us out afterwards. Like no distance between our minds, like no wall between us, things were so much easier and simpler back then. I obviously know there will be a tough route for us to continue our journey together, but if we don't stand strong ourselves, nobody can help us. If our love is so strong, nobody can stop us.

All I wanted, is to be with you until I die, I'd rather be like this. But maybe, I missed the chance to. I never though of this would happen to us. If I turned 60 without being together with you, I wish you're happy with your life that way, living it to the fullest until we disappear in this world. Ah meowa.. my ben ben naughty meow.. Still got naughty naughty not? Be guai okay? I love you, very very much baby. I do love you.