Satisfaction

I feel like slapping myself right now.
Saw my coursemate's update about their timetable and getting one of the best lecturer ever to teach them.
And I felt so.. SIGH!!!!
Why I always miss the fun???
Why all good things happened after I leave like band and others?

Why do I feel like this?
I am going to the UK soon, and this is also a great experience right?
Why can't I be satisfy and let go of things that I am unable to reach?
Why am I always jealous? It feels like my jealousy is more than everything in me.
What the heck happened to me???

Please, since when I feel satisfied..
But I am sure that the only thing I am satisfied with is having a great family.

Other than that? I just can say. I need MORE.

Cannot. I must make my life meaningful and colorful.
My mind keep on telling me I need all.
ALL. Frustrated with myself now.
I need to stay calm. Move on. And live my life, my way.
I need to stop looking at others, feeling jealous.
URGH SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME TO GET RID OF THIS PERSONALITY!!!